A Journey Through Pain, Healing, and Living: my story told through music

Every now and then I have shared parts of my difficult journey through marriage, divorce, and co-parenting on this blog. I have always been amazed and gratified to see the response to these posts- going through this kind of experience is often an extremely isolating experience, and if sharing my experience can help one person feel they are not alone, it is definitely worth it. Today I wanted to share some more of my journey in the best way I know: through music.

This post has been written in my head for a few months now. It is difficult to explain the emotional journey that I've been through in words, but over the years I've come across different songs that speak to where I was/am. Today I want to share with you, in chronological order, the songs that have really connected to my emotional experience over the last several years. I have found this to be one of the most effective ways of sharing my experience with others, and I hope that others going through difficult periods in their life will find comfort and connection somewhere in this list.

Before I do, though, a few important notes:

1. As with any emotional journey, this is certainly not a straight trajectory. Although I am presenting the songs below in the order in which I most connected with them, there were and are times when I went back and forth between various emotional stages. 
2. I'm not saying that each song is a perfect match to how I was / am feeling in my own experience. Obviously each situation is unique. However the overall message and feeling in each song was definitely something I deeply connected to and felt expressed where I was. 

With that, I offer you my journey, told through music.

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Small Goals: October 2016

I'm linking up with Jennifer over at The Yellow Brick Road to share my small goals for the month of October! If you haven't ever checked out the Small Goals monthly link-up, you really should head over to Jennifer's post (just click on the image below) and read through the posts. I always find it entertaining and insightful to read about what others are thinking and planning, and I often find inspiration for things I want to try myself as well!

First, a look back at the goals I set last month:

1. Remember to take my lunch out of the fridge

So I figured this one out but maybe not in the way I had intended- I just stopped putting my lunch in the fridge. I now put my packed lunch (with an ice pack) right next to my purse as soon as I make it. I haven't forgotten to take my lunch to school since.

2. Try not to scream when I hear, "I want"

This fun phase that my daughter was going through has died down enough for me to say that I did achieve my goal. I'm not saying I don't still have 4 year olds who often *cough* act their age, but the constant whining has been toned down enough to make it manageable. 

3. Get the rest of my new centers set up

Yes! This is an actual thing that I actually did! I just finished putting together the last one this past weekend and I will be sharing some of my new ideas in future blog posts.

OK, so on with this month's goals!

1. Reconnect with a few friends

With all of the back-to-school craziness, I have to admit I have let some of my friendships slip onto the back burner. I've recently had several moments when one of them would pop into my head randomly and I would realize that I hadn't talked to them since August- I think that's my cue to set aside some time to reconnect! I have 3 people specifically in mind that I definitely want to get in touch with in the next couple of weeks, even if it's just a few texts.

2. Enjoy Halloween with my daughters

I'm not really a Halloween person, to be honest. I grew up in Japan where (at least in my day) it wasn't even a thing. But this year I am looking forward to doing a little trick-or-treating with my girls, because it's the first time in 3 years that we'll actually be together for Halloween evening (just the way the days fell with custody the last 2 Halloweens). As you might imagine, the last time I was with them for trick-or-treating time they weren't really into it (being under 2 at the time). I'm hoping to convince them not to dress up as Disney characters, but that may be setting the bar too high for myself...

3. Start teaching ukulele for the first time

Yes it's true. I got a donorschoose project funded just before the start of summer vacation, and my instruments finally all arrived a few weeks ago! I've been scheming for months now and I can't wait to introduce my 6th graders to the ukulele! I am slightly dreading the inevitable tuning/string issues, but I think it will be worth it. I have a picture on my Instagram account if you want to see them hanging beautifully on my classroom wall!!!! :)

I think that's it for me this month! Make sure to go check out Jennifer's post to read about what other bloggers are up to this month and share your own small goals :)

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Things to do While Students are Waiting in Line

For one reason or another, I often find myself with a class ready to transition to the next teacher, but with that next teacher nowhere in sight. What do you do when that happens? It can be difficult to keep students quiet and orderly while standing in line, but ready for the next teacher whenever they arrive. I've used different ideas over the years but here are my current favorites.

I used to do more singing and body percussion when I was waiting with a class, but in my current school, because of the location of my classroom and where we usually line up, we have to stay pretty quiet in line to avoid disrupting other classes. All of the ideas below are ones that can be done silently.

1. Mirroring

This is probably the simplest but also the most effective for all ages. I hold up my hand from the front of the line and tell them to mirror me. Depending on how well the students can see me at the back, I will either just do slow movements with my hands, held above me head, or (if they can see me) include my head/face/shoulders in the movements as well. I start off with simple movements, like counting on my fingers from 1 to 5, or clenching and unclenching my fist. Once they get the idea, are quiet and focused, and are just starting to think this might be too boring, I start throwing in some challenges: holding my pinky with my other fingers, moving only one finger, etc (this is admittedly a little easier for me because I'm double jointed!). I also use some silly motions, like the spiderman hand (when he is shooting spiderweb stuff out of his wrist), or pretending to pick my nose.

2. Silent Singing

If you've recently done a song in class with hand motions, start mouthing the words while doing the motions and have students do it with you! Not only do you get to review the song, but it's good steady beat practice and it's pretty hilarious. With older students it's even fun to bring back some of their favorites from kindergarten and 1st grade. Their faces light up when they recognize the song (and then I have to remind them not to sing out loud)!

3. Addition Game

This one has nothing to do with music but it is another option that works well and gives them some practice on their math facts (which no administrator or homeroom teacher will ever complain about!). I tell them I am going to hold up a certain number of fingers, and they have to hold up the number of fingers needed to add up to 5 (or 10). This is especially mind-stretching if you do it after the mirroring activity :)

I hope you found at least one new idea here to add to your "bag of tricks"! What are your favorite things to do when you'r stuck waiting in line?

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Open Shelf Toy Storage to Foster Independent Play

My biggest home improvement project since moving into our new home almost a year ago has been the finished basement. I've gradually been transforming it from a dark TV room into a bright, happy kid's playroom. One of the biggest changes to the space, besides painting the dark wood paneling white, was putting in some new white shelves to hold a lot of the girls' toys. The new storage has been working out really well and has allowed the girls to play more independently, so today I wanted to share what I did!

I had this open space in my wall after taking out a giant china cabinet (that I moved to another room), and these Billy bookcases from IKEA fit perfectly! I already had the colored fabric bins (craigslist finds from years ago), but I also wanted to get some clear bins, especially for the higher shelves, so that the girls could see what was in the bins without taking them off the shelves. It may not look as clean and sleek, but I decided long ago that when it comes to toy storage, ease of access for the people using them is more important than how magazine-ready it looks!

I found these clear bins at IKEA to use on the shelves. Put sideways, they fit perfectly on the shelf. Turned longways, they stick out from the shelf a little bit, but they still stay just find and allow more room to put other bins and toys next to them. Also, they're a lot cheaper than most anything else I saw that was tall enough to maximize the shelf space!

I put all of the toys that the girls use the most (and that I'm comfortable with them using without supervision) on the bottom shelves, and gradually worked my way up to the items that I don't mind them playing with, but definitely require supervision. For now, that mostly includes things like big paint bottles, beads, and board games with lots of pieces that I don't want to lose :)

Although it's probably not ready for any home decorating magazine features, I do like that the girls can see everything clearly and access all of the toys that I want them to reach on their own, and I don't really mind the "eclectic" look of the fabric bins, clear bins, and loose toys mixed together on the shelves. Now that they know where everything is, the girls will quite often run down the stairs and start playing on their own without me even being in the same room (which is no small miracle for me!). Mission accomplished! ;)

You don't need big bookcases to utilize the concept of open shelf storage for toys at home. If you're interested, here is my previous post on how I organized the toys in our old apartment with the same principles:

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